Affirmagy Blog

Just like when I was 13 and telling everyone about the car I was going to buy for high school, as adults it takes a team of people knowing and supporting our big plans to make them come true.

I was lucky enough as a teenager to have a dad that not only believed in me, but pushed me to make things happen in life. “You want a car? Great, get a job. And then I will help you make it happen.” If I earned enough to buy the Mustang of my 15 year-old-dreams, he would match me. My dad was my first teammate.
While I no longer have anyone in my personal life that will front half of the money for what I want, I do have a team of people that get what I am up to and help me get there. As I reflect on the past year, having created a network of personal and professional cheerleaders has never served me better.
As Robert Kiyosaki of Rich Dad, Poor Dad has his Rich Dad Advisors, I have built my “team of professionals” as I like to call them.
Thinking about building a Dream Team? Or adding to your existing roster of pros? Here are some tips to make it happen.

1. Always seek to serve. As Zig Ziglar taught me; To get what you want, help others get what they want. This is so true. BUT HERE’S THE TRICK. Always seek to serve without an agenda for personal gain. Be helpful. Be thoughtful. And most of all be genuine. The universe rewards kindness and thoughtfulness. Start seeking to serve, and be amazed at how that same energy is returned to you.

2. Be deliberate about the caliber of people you desire in your life. Yes, we get to decide who is in our lives. In fact, I encourage you to look around your life. Who’s there? The people you attract are in complete alignment with the energy you are sending out. Want to be around more abundant people? Start thinking abundantly. Want more loving people? You know what to do.

3. Adopt a “Gratitude is my Attitude” mantra. Being in gratitude is like building a huge magnet that attracts more and more of what you are grateful for. It’s is truly one of life’s coolest things. Here’s a great action item: write 5 notes a week to the people in your life that you value. Send them a note just because and TELL them you are thankful for them. This can’t help but make you (and them!) feel great.

Getting your team (and getting on some other teams) will rocket you forward. All it takes is a little time, energy and thoughtfulness.

I will never forget seeing the founders of “Life is Good” on the cover of Worthwhile magazine! It was a double whammy day - I discovered a great new magazine and I got inspired by others following their dreams in business. If I dug deep enough, I bet I could find that issue…..

Anyway, Worthwhile magazine is now Motto: Work with Passion, Purpose and Profit. This is one of those “geez, I wish I had done that!” moments. The articles, the resources…. I’ll write more about these super cool people later. Today I invite you to explore for yourself and see people doing really great things in action. These guys are pros.

Do women and men differ when it comes to referrals?

While I don’t possess a man’s perspective on this, I can say with confidence women refer nearly as often as they breathe. No getting around it, it’s how we’re wired. I believe giving a powerful referral is an art worthy of thought and finesse. That said, some of us are just better at it that others. The good news is this is a skill you can acquire when you come at it from the right frame of mind: ‘what’s in it for them’.

Seth Godin, author of Purple Cow: Transform Your Business by Being Remarkable shares great insight into referrals in his blog today. However, I have to disagree with his third point “the act of recommending you isn’t easy. It’s not easy to recommend a tailor to make your co-worker look a little less shabby. It’s not easy to bring up the fact that you have a great psychiatrist or even a particularly wonderful (but very expensive) shoe store.” Actually, for women it is easy to refer a tailor (or wardrobe consultant) to a colleague, we will brag about how great our therapist is, and shoes… well… we’re women for goodness sake. We know and we talk. Giving referrals - knowing who IS remarkable - is one way we build community. When we’re smart, we leverage this skill to grow our businesses, and build deep relationships.
So, with that, it’s my pleasure to refer to you Seth Godin. Read his books - you’ll come away with powerful insights and tools you can use!

The ease of doing business is in direct proportion to the size of my rolodex and the depth of my relationships. You want to grow your business? Call through your rolodex. You want to quantum leap your business? Expand your rolodex.

Be on the lookout for good people that you need in your sphere of influence.
When I am given a business card, I treat it like gold. One huge lesson I learned from a master networker was to keep a business card portfolio with me at all times with the 50 or 60 people I loved referring business too. Referring people is a great way to grow your business. It’s free, and it creates goodwill that will return to you for years to come.

Most of us do a pretty good job of thanking our customers… Or least we think we do. But do you ever thank your vendor partners?

As a small business we rely heavily on the work of others to get the job done. One of the smartest things I ever did (and I had no idea the impact it had until recently) was give a gift certificate to Amazon.com to Craig, the owner of CreativeTechs, the computer tech company we work with. I knew that he loved to listen to books on CD, so we thought this was a great way to thank and acknowledge him for the always serving us so well.

Computers are one of the main arteries in our business so CreativeTechs is vital member of our team. Over the years Craig, and I have become friends and he has helped me in countless ways to grow our company. While talking one afternoon he reminded me of the gift certificate we gave him and in his words said “that’s when I realized you were people I really wanted to deepen the business relationship with. I am impressed with how well you say ‘thank you.’

I think the gift certificate cost us $50. The relationship to this day: priceless.

As strongly as I feel about writing personal notes, this is a close second on the success scale.
Get in the habit of referring people powerfully. When I meet new people I genuinely think about who in my network would be a good fit for them and make a warm introduction. No “here’s a card, call these guys”. Rather I would take the time to personally connect them.

In my early 20’s I heard Zig Ziglar give a presentation and declare “to get what you want in life, help someone else get what they want”. I remember thinking ‘What? That’s crazy. I don’t have enough time to get me what I want, now I am supposed to help someone else?

Years later the light bulb went off. Zig is right. The goodwill and positive energy you create from a great referral will always comes back tenfold.

Run for the hills if someone says ‘it’s just business”.
This is the ultimate tip off that person believes that they can treat you poorly, pay you late, and expect the moon and the stars because “it’s business”. I have yet to hear those words inside a win-win relationship.

Want to really wow someone? I don’t care how big or small you company is, it’s essential that you do this one thing like your life depends on it; write personal notes. Not an email, not a typed letter…. a handwritten personal note. And if you can do it within 24 hours of meeting someone, or talking on the phone - you’ll make a powerful impression in a world drunk on email and text messages.

This is undoubtedly one of the most powerful business building activities I’ve ever done. Try it. You’ll be amazed at the results.